You know what. It must be the sky. The star sign. The position of the stars or just my feelings being as messed up as my mind is. But I really don't know what guys expect of me.
You stare at my boobs instead of my eyes and hope that I like you the most and stay by your side hanging with you and being always available? I am not like that. I've passed through a lot. I've had romantic, desperates and funny gestures during my love life. I've had huge deceptions and a tough life. I know how I can be treated. I always liked letters, poems, songs, romantic and musical movies... I may not be a person who feels too much but I like romance even if it is perishable.
So for once, just once... I wish I could be seen less femme fatale and more like a cute woman with real feelings. I am not just a hot body that wants to hook and be the great adventure of your life. Mostly I am, but sometimes I get tired. Don't get me wrong, I don't look for this anymore and now I know that it is a consequence but I miss it. Sometimes I really do.
I wish I could win a handmade gift that means a lot to me. I wish someone would me prepare me a dinner with candles and stuff. I wish I could have someone to watch and sing along some musical movies with me. Or go to museums and stuff. Brunch. I wish I could be given a cactus or a hand drawing portrait. I wish I could be the reason someone wrote a love letter. I wish I could be surprised by something special or just a box of chocolate. I always dreamed about a morning breakfast at bed. I wish someone could pay so many attention to me that he could know more details about me and use this to make me happy. I wish someone could make a playlist about the moments we had like I always do in secret. Yes, I do this and I don't send it to the person. I wish to have a picnic in a spot with lots of nature. I do like that. I am a country girl. I wish I could have someone to listen to my cute songs by my side. Or that wouldn't care about making an effort and learn how to dance "can I have this dance". I wish I could have someone to recite reflections of a skyline with me. I wish I could have someone to put a blanket around me during a cold night. I wish I could have someone to just hug me during a cold night. I like songs, I don't dream about someone making me a song but instead I wish I could have someone singing to me. I get really emotional. I wish someone could pay attention to me like that.
But I don't inspire this kind of stuff in anyone. Not anymore. I became so cold that no one sees me like a person anymore. Everyone see me like an idea. A great adventure. Someone who can change the daily life and give you a wild sex. And yes, I don't like routine. And yes I like most kinds of sex. But, sometimes I wish I could have the luck of a quiet love.
